The Couch Can Make You Smarter...

So today I was sick. I have been battling something this whole weekend, and today decided I couldn't hang out with the kindergartners. Instead I made a nice indention in the couch for more than half the day. It's surprising the things you can learn while on the couch by yourself!

I learned...

1. the sexiest two things about a women in the eyes of a man is her touch and her breasts... Thank you Greg Behrendt.
   
2. that milk probably isn't the best think to drink when you can't breathe.
   
3. the neighbor next door loves to listen to Metallica early in the morning while running up and down the stairs.
   
4. someones missing some quarters. Finders keepers!
5. watching Tyra makes your I.Q. drop a few points.
6. that you'll never fall asleep and forget the pizza in the oven again. The smell stays with you forever.
7. that if you like licorice travel to China, they have a tree that produces a seed that tastes the same. Don't thank me, thank Martha Stewart for that one. I can't take credit.